Tuesday 5 June 2007

Scary things

The night before Easter, my normally confident little Bambi announced that she was 'a bit scared' of the Easter Bunny. It transpired that she had seen two people in bunny outfits handing out eggs and (do give a child credit here) thought something was amiss. As tempted as I was by the thought of a sugar-free Easter, I felt that some Easter eggs should make it into the fray (not the least for me!) and began negotiations.

She was not buying the story about the human sized bunnies being fake - this was clearly what differentiated the Easter Bunny from normal bunnies. Extra height and reticulated thumbs are quite obviously what gives him his supercharged chocolate producing powers. Eventually we promised to not let him into our house. But, if it rained, he was allowed to leave any offerings inside the storm door. One should always take care not to let one's chocolate offerings get soggy, you understand.

Then, several weeks later, she announced that she was scared of Barney. This made more sense. A large, purple dinosaur would freak me out too if I hadn't made the whole person inside connection. Don't let those catchy tunes fool ya!

But then, when I asked her what she thought Barney was going to do to her if she met him, she told me that he would tickle her. Exuberant tickling by a large purple dinosaur....hmmmm. Okay, fair enough. Again we decided that, should Barney ever visit our street we would simply not let him into our house and take cover in the pantry.

Today I took Bambi and Granny to see The Wiggles - Live in Concert at the Royal Concert Hall. Her first foray into live theatre was in the form of four loudly dressed Australian men. I'm still not too sure how I feel about this. I had imagined something more highbrow. Carmen for Kids, or The Nutcracker perhaps. At least Dan Zanes. But then he didn't make it to Glasgow.
Anyway, before spending a fair whack on tickets I asked her if she was scared of The Wiggles.
'No Mummy. They're men. Like Daddy.'
Just wait till the Good Man hears that he's a hip-wiggling, primary colour-wearing, Aussie accented singer of itty ditties. At least in the eyes of his daughter.

16 comments:

jenny said...

Ah yes, the Wiggles... I took my first 2 to a concert by them and methinks it was more for the parents than the kids. There were more mommies holding roses for Dorothy the Dinosaur and waving feathered swords for Captain Feathersword ( I think they would wave panties if not for the kids) than there were kids. A friend of mine said she just sighed at the sound of (his name escapes me, but he's the one in the red shirt, the lead singer) voice. Me being Deaf.. I have no idea what she is swooning at, all I see are men singing silly words doing a wiggly dance. Not my idea of romance.
Did you have a good time??

The Good Woman said...

Actually, yes! But that was more down to Bambi's reaction to seeing the real, live, Wiggles and bopping as only she can.

We bowed out of the roses and swords. I'm pretty cheap...

Squirmy Popple said...

I never quite believed in the Easter Bunny because I couldn't get my head around the concept of a human-sized bunny. Santa could be rationalised, but the Easter Binny - now that was just silly.

Kim said...

I am afraid of Barney, too.

The Good Woman said...

Yes, Katie but that he brings chocolate provides just enough incentive to see past the silliness.

Kaycie, at this stage I think BArney should be scared of ME!

Gwen said...

Of course whose to say that if you let the wiggles into your house they wouldn't also tickle you to death and force feed you lots of chocolate. One must be wary of cheery kids entertainers.

Stay at home dad said...

The Wiggles are like no men I've ever met... very, very, scary. The first time I saw them I kept rewinding the CD, convinced it was all an elaborate hoax, but no, it seemed only TOO real.

Colin Campbell said...

The Wiggles are the third most trustworthy entities in Australia according to a recent poll. They are also some of the richest entertainers out there. They have made a lot of kids and parents very happy with their inane upbeat happy songs. Our kids have grown out of them, but at one point, they were gods. My wife's best friend dated the Yellow Wiggle, so yes they are real.

The Good Woman said...

So true, Gwen, so true.

SAHD - real and unreal all at the same time. They're on to something though - not that great at singing, dancing or acting but some of the highest grossing entertainers in Australia. And I really think Bambi's right - it's because they look like Dad.

Hi Colin. Welcome. Was that Greg or Sam? I hear the handover was pretty big news over there. AN as you seem to have experience in these matters, how do you stop a two year old singing endless refrains of 'hot potato'?

Anonymous said...

Just found you! I think I'd be quite happy for the Easter bunny to visit my house so long as he/she had lots of chocolate eggs! But I can't visualise an Easter bunny anymore without thinking about Wallace & Gromit classic, The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (I think it's called) which Amy and me absolutely love watching!
And the Wiggles, I just can't make them out. They seem very entertaining and Amy has one of their DVD's but I'm not so sure myself! Crystal xx

The Good Woman said...

Hi Crystal. I think we've all been programmed to keep our children away from OTT men, but I'm pretty confident this bunch are benign.

Life As I Know It said...

Kids love the Wiggles...and they are making a boatload of cash so they must be doing something right.

My kids have always been scared of Santa, Easter Bunny, etc...lots of great photos of the kids in tears sitting on Santa's lap ;)

Glad you had a good time!

lady macleod said...

LOL Between you and Sparx I am grinning like anything. Your child is no pushover. I love the whole Barney/tickling thing.

Poor good man, just how do you intend to break this to him? Perhaps over a good wine. You should wear something quite sexy to buck him up a bit I should think.

Pascale Clerk said...

Hi good woman, I like reading your blog as I'm a French married to a Scot and I have a Scottish-friendly blog myself. My 3 year old son is a big fan of the Wiggles. In fact, he could play the DVD over and over again especially Capt. Feathersword's song (quack quack quack cock-a-doodle-do, you know the one). It's daft but not as twee as Barney. Personally I think the most attractive Wiggle is the blue one.

The Good Woman said...

hiya LAIKI. Bambi managed her first two Christmases with aplomb but then she's always been a sucker for gift wrap! We'll see how she goes this year though.


Lady M. The Good Man is away again which at least gives me time to strategise. Unfotuantely he is violently allergic to alcohol so the wine would probably kill him - not quite the effect I'm after. The negligee is an idea though - although I'll undoubtedly ruin the effect by chuckling loudly each time I think of him singing quack, quack, cock-adoodledoo!

Hi Pascale. Went to your blog and am sdaly lacking linguistically. However, it does appear that we frequent many similar events and places. If you ever see a tall brunette looking at you asakance it's probably me.

And yes, I know the tune. Sadly, can't get it out of my head!

Pascale Clerk said...

Sorry about the tune !
I am aware you can't speak all the languages. Just for your information, I live in France but I come back to Scotland regularly. The pictures of Kelburn Castle were taken from its official website. I'm looking forward to my next visit in August to take my own pictures.